Intimacy is Personal

My hair lady told me the story of her pastor asking how many people in the congregation had “been intimate” in the past month, and she said there were only a few people who raised their hands.

I wish I had been there. I would have (I like to think, anyway) stood up and told him that intimacy between married couples is precious, private, and none of his business. I would say that anyone who did raise their hands and put their relationship issues on public display was unwise, as they cheapened it by so doing. I would say that he himself doesn’t understand intimacy or he wouldn’t be discussing it and encouraging others to do so, as if he were asking something as mundane and common as, “Who among you are morning people?” or, “Raise your hands if red is your favorite color.”

Obviously there is a problem when people are no longer “intimate” but I submit that the problem won’t be solved by making it a matter of public discussion.

The most important things in life should often be the most private. Talking to God, asking for the courage to be real, the grace to forgive, for renewed desire, and anything else that comes to mind will put you on the road to bliss. Further advancements can be gained in talking to each other, and to God with each other–intimately. It may be that there is additional wise counsel to be sought as well, but let it not be a pastor who thinks this is all for public consumption.

Honor your marriage, and each others’ hearts by being truly intimate–it’s between the two of you. That heart honoring will foster physical intimacy. Psssst! Don’t tell anyone. It’s a lovely secret, just between the two of you and the Lover of your souls.

For further discussion be ready for October 12! The Maker’s Marriage, all expanded and improved, will be ready for you.

Zero For Six–Feeling the Freedom

So much more than time is lost to the screen, to junk TV. As we connect to the entire world we lose connections with our own hearts, and with our Creator. As we watch and see and are programmed by the creations of others, we cease to create. We are stilled. Jailed even.

The great narcotic, the false god, the black box we come before at every opportunity–that is TV. “There’s nothing worth watching,” we hear others lament, and agree. And yet we go. Just as pagans of old throwing the valuable before a dead god to no avail, so we sacrifice our very lives to TV.

That man who was called into politics–he only watches the news and rants. The child whose art was lauded and entered into the World’s Fair at age 6–she can’t wait to leave her cubicle and get home to her shows. And year after year she becomes a bit less picky about the offerings. She’s not even embarrassed that porn (call it what you will) comes into her home day after day. (Note: research reveals there is an inverse relationship between watching porn and a personally satisifying sexual relationship.)

Yes, there are Pride and Prejudice with Colin Firth, Emma, Jeeves and Wooster, Fawlty Towers, and James Herriot’s All Creatures Great and Small. But how many times can you watch these, or Quigley Down Under, Man on Fire, and Rocky? If there’s nothing worth watching, push the “off” button. It can be done. We can just stop rewarding Hollywood by opening our pocketbooks and hearts to insulting excuses for entertainment.

Last night, May 31, was my final movie for six months, and I chose carefully. I considered You’ve Got Mail, and my visiting daughter suggested Bruce Willis’ Red, but we couldn’t find the DVDs (not paying for movies via Internet). I thought carefully. What would be worth the watch–excellent plot, casting, acting, and not a single dull moment? Oh, and one where the guy gets the girl. I chose a movie where I actually did shut my eyes (I take seriously the Bible’s admonition to guard my heart) a time or two for a moment or two. What is this paragon of a movie? Spectre.

Interestingly, given this post’s subject and matter of introspection, Spectre is about James Bond saving the world from being watched.

Could it be that when we do nothing but watch, when we never pause to think, we set the stage for our own demise?

Please consider joining me, if not on a Zero For Six TV adventure, at least on the sensationally rewarding activity of pushing the “off” button. Even if you simply sit still and do nothing, you will begin to reconnect with your marvelous self. Who knows what will happen–you may make a jailbreak!