Marriage Advice

The Only Narcissist You Need to Worry About

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

First, can we agree that time spend on YouTube learning how at least half the people we know are raging narcissists is, well, not time well spent? And what is the point, anyway? I’ll tell you what Maryl di Milo said in a YouTube video about a book she was reviewing, which advocates, among other things, getting away from less than pleasant (narcissistic) people: “It’s about self-preservation.”

I haven’t read this book, and it may be extremely helpful, but if it’s another book that points me to me, I don’t need it. I can do self-preservation instead of trusting the only One who can preserve me, easy peasy–no help needed.

And anyway, is that what we’re here for–self-preservation? I think not. Let’s learn that any self-focused thing (oops, isn’t that narcissism?) may not be our friend. Let’s learn that so often the people so determined to label people as narcissists may have a few less-than-selfless traits themselves.

Shall I look into the mirror? Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the most narcissistic of all?

Oh, that’s my husband, my daughter-in-law, my neighbor. Why can’t we just know that as long as we’re here we’ll likely be fighting self-worship in some form, and simply mind our own narcissistic business.

And here’s a thought: Let’s find something a little more constructive (see the New Testament) to do about troublesome people than just toss them out of our lives.

Revival of What?

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

I have been, with so many others, praying for revival in our land, in the world, in the church. But it occurs to me we might want to agree with God’s reasons for revival, and we might pray a little deeper about this. I feel I am treading on dangerous ground here, when I say we need to pray for revival not so gas prices go down, and wages go up, and life becomes safer and more comfortable. Yes, these are all nice things, but let’s have pure motivation, purified via abiding in Christ Jesus, so that we pray for revival with a heart of flesh.

Again, lets pray a little deeper, about that place where it all begins: at home. We can never pray too passionately for families–that marriages are strong, couples simply awash in the Love of God. Let us pray that children are so intensely valued that we see them exactly as their Creator sees them–the greatest imaginable of gifts, and worthy of training, discipline, and focused attention–undergirded by unending prayer and warfare.

Why not stop speaking what is: skyrocketing divorce rates, kids left bereft and easy prey for any predator and taker, pornography in schools, etc. How about we believe the Word of God which tells us, in short, that we have what we say. Let’s declare what we want (and INTEND) to see, rather than what is. When we lament what the enemy is up to, and what he’s already accomplished, it’s glorifying him and his work. It’s a perverse/death-bringing use of the tongue (see Proverbs 18:21).

We not only have what we say, we believe what we say. So, let’ say something that’s truth–something believable, remembering that everything Satan does, every evil, is based on a lie. It’s a lie that we can’t overcome, that any battle is too far gone, that we have to just wait it out and hope we survive.

We are not just conquerors. We are more than conquerors. When will we see this truth? When we believe God and say what He says; when there is a revival in our own hearts.

In reading the following aloud, and not fussing about the KJV translation (or just read in your own Bible) you will feel hope arise in your heart. And, I pray, the peace of God. And the Love that works with faith to bring . . . revival!

Romans 8: 31-39

What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?

He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?

Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God’s elect? It is God that justifieth.

Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. 

Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

That’s How You Change the World, Ladies!

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

Getting Saltier Than Ever About Home Things and a Certain White Man

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The Goal of Life–and it’s not Man-Bashing!

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My First YouTube Video2 of 2023–A Hooray in Two Parts!

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The Maker’s Marriage–Romance Reimagined

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

Finally! I have just now gotten the new and expanded Maker’s Marriage on Amazon Kindle (paperback and hard cover are “in review” and coming soon).

Please check it out–it will be a nice gift to someone else or to you and yours!

Better Late than Never

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

I really did have my act (YouTube video) together as promised, by 11:00 this morning. But this was the day when our new internet was (supposedly) being installed and THERE WAS NO INTERNET BETWEEN 9:00 and noon! But it’s there now!

V is for Victory and P is for PLEASE Pass this on!

Henri Nouwen on “hope far beyond” and changing my heart

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment
Compassion born in solitude makes us very much aware of our own historicity. We are not called to respond to generalities but to the concrete facts with which we are confronted day after day. A compassionate man can no longer look at these manifestations of evil and death as disturbing interruptions of his life plan but rather has to confront them as an opportunity for the conversion of himself and his fellow human beings. Every time in history that men and women have been able to respond to the events of their world as an occasion to change their hearts, an inexhaustible source of generosity and new life has been opened, offering hope far beyond the limits of human prediction. – Henri Nouwen

Proverbs 14 – The Wise Woman Builds . . .

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

If you read the Proverb of the Day you’ll see today’s first verse (Proverbs 14:1) tells us that the wise woman builds her house. Digging into this we find “house” referring not only to a physical dwelling place, but also meaning “family.” The rest of the verse tells us that a foolish woman pulls her house down with her own hands, but let us now talk about how to build, how to be wise.

It always begins with humble and yet ferociously faithful prayer. Would you see your house as a strong and sure shelter for the hearts of all those you’ve been given to love? Do you want to build, nurture, partner with God Himself as a grace architect? Pray first. First pray. Pray, intercede, fight the good fight of faith for those you’ve been given to love. To Love.

This is serious business, this Love. This is God. We hear and say, “God is Love” and we go on and act like He’s a tyrant, not to be trusted. Well, there is one way out of that destructive thinking, and it begins with a determination to build, to obliterate the lies of the enemy, to be as Paul, “not unaware of his schemes.” In short, (this is too simple) read the Word of God.

You can begin with the Proverb of the Day–today’s the 14th, so read Proverbs 14, then get lifted with Psalms, taking your sweet time with sweet Jesus. Read some of His words in the Gospel of John, maybe try some GE Power from Galatians and Ephesians (I can’t ever read too much of Ephesians). And back to Proverbs for some scriptures on the power of the tongue, maybe . . . then full circle back to that house building.

Proverbs 14:11 tells us ” . . . the tent of the upright will flourish. Flourish–I like the sound of that, and find it defined thus in Strong’s Concordance: pârach, paw-rakh’; a primitive root; to break forth as a bud, i.e. bloom; generally, to spread; specifically, to fly (as extending the wings); figuratively, to flourish:—abroad, abundantly, blossom, break forth (out), bud, flourish, make fly, grow, spread, spring (up).

So, let’s go back to that “upright” business, as we surely want our tents to flourish. Again, from Strong’s: straight, upright, correct, right. It is straight, upright, correct, and right that we wise women build our houses–our beloveds–with faith-filled, Word-based prayer. We don’t need to talk about it, or plan ahead and dress up for it. Just do it right this very minute. Now!

“Father, I thank you for those you’ve given me to love. Let me Love as You Love. Show me how to build my house. Reveal any place I’m tearing it down. Teach me, reveal to me the glory and privilege of being Your ambassador to my beloveds. Help me to be wise. In You. Amen.”