Proverbs 31 woman

Have You Bought the Lie?

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

The home truth is beautiful, so unutterably beautiful.

A young man once told my husband that his wife wasn’t using her education, helping with the finances (they had kids).  John said, “Nothing you will ever do is as important as what she’s doing at home with those kids.”

A respected woman with many, many YouTube viewers recently talked about how we all have a ministry, and could be reaching the whole world with a YouTube channel.  She said to stop with the excuses—not enough time, not tech savvy, later when the kids are grown . . . . . There was more—about callings and purposes, about building things . . .

And then she said an indicator that you might need to be building a YouTube ministry is if it’s already what you do—the one who prays for people, the one people call for encouragement—that sort of thing.

There’s a lot in that, and it’s worth a bit of a ponder, a chewing on, before swallowing.  First, if you have a family, you have a ministry, and it can change the world.  Second, the answer about waiting until the kids are grown is not an excuse—it’s a priority and a conviction about what’s right and real.  And third–what if you spend all that building-and-blessing-your-own-beloveds time (the ones gifted specifically to you by God), building a YouTube channel? Is that wisdom? Better find out from the One who knows.

It’s not “I can do all things through christ jesus.” It’s, “I can do all things through CHRIST JESUS!” Otherwise, we’re looking in vain for that purpose-driven life, trying to feel like our lives matter, that we matter, and trying to find that approval, that “Job well done!” from a world who doesn’t really know us or care.  Silly, silly.

Daughter Rebekah and I recently watched Love’s Portrait (beautiful, beautiful movie set in Ireland) and while it was a lovely romance, the subplot blessed me as well.  There was a little sister who was told she needed to go make a life for herself.  She said, “I already have.”  Her life was rich and full and she was wise enough to know it, and to ignore all the “wise” ones giving that worth-what-she-paid-for-it advice.

I’m thinking that before we have any advice worth sharing we need to be doing the first and foremost of all ministries and callings, the most world-impacting of all building—we need to build our homes.  Let’s wait a bit on Proverbs 31 vineyard planting and sash sewing and making bunches of money.  Let’s go back to Proverbs 14—The wise woman builds her house–house meaning, among other things worthy, her family.

Building people, making history, ensuring tomorrow—that’s what homemaking is, even if you’re the last woman standing in this lonely arena (you’re not—that’s a lie from Hell) you are among the good and great company of real and true women throughout the ages who knew what was what, as do you.

But you don’t need anyone’s company or approval. You will pray and grow and know that your husband’s heart safely trusts you, and you will be blessed by your children, and you will know that you know your life matters.  And one fine day you will hear, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Yes, there’s a whole lot of servant-ing going on in this most excellent of lives, but then Jesus was a servant, wasn’t he? 

Zero For Six Going Strong

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

Mostly. I am not even missing non-essential viewing. Not one minute has been lost to TV since I began my four adventures. To re-cap, I began a quest on June 1: Let’s see what happens when (and if it’s possible) I attempt a six-month exit from the lands of: 1) TV watching; 2) fatiguing food consumption; 3) negative words; and 4) non-essential spending.

About that non-essential spending. Well . . . I bought two new outfits yesterday, and I won’t bore you with assertions of how essential these outfits are, of how long it’s been since I bought anything new, etc. I will say that John was trying to get me to go shopping for new clothes, and wasn’t giving up. I will say that there is no buyer’s remorse. I will say that I didn’t buy these clothes because they were on sale, which can often be likened to eating a bag of cookies because they’re low sodium. The satisfaction just isn’t there.

Moving on to what’s the toughest part–negative words. Boy, is this a process. It is helpful to me to keep on keeping on reading Psalms and Proverbs. Not only do I find therein continual evidence of the importance of words of life, of faith, but the help needed to stay the course.

And I pray. There are those tricky little areas that most people, including me, wouldn’t even notice as negativity. But upon further examination . . . when I think about the power of words, and that what I just said was a pronouncement of power, but not for good, I find so much of what I say is enforcing a feeling of helplessness and hopelessness. “It is what it is,” is a dumb thing to say. It’s defeat. Talking the problem simply solidifies it in our minds as unsolvable.

I’d like to say, regarding consumption of fatiguing foods, that I’m doing soooo well, good, and fantastic! I’ll simply that that I’m making a bit of progress. My coffee consumption isn’t remaining at zero, but like the purchasing of those above-mentioned new outfits, I am making it special. For instance, yesterday. I split a piece of actually and truly made-from-scratch key lime pie with my daughter at Island Grill in Fort Collins, and had a cup of coffee that almost made me swoon when the server set it down under my nose. Since this was the appetizer and followed with a simply divine burger and cole slaw, I was not at all fatigued. Interesting concept: Food that is sometimes fatiguing can, done right, be energizing . . .

I am absolutely loving not watching. Not simply sitting and watching (and munching) I get a little more excited about life every single day. Might I suggest, ever so gently, that you consider a Zero For Six adventure quest of your own?

Thanks for joining me!

Jesus the Homemaker

~ Bev Parker ~ Leave a comment

The Word of God tells us to “guard our hearts” and that sounds like a defensive posture, which sounds, well, defensive.  But it’s actually a preparation and strength posture.

I think of it in physical terms as the Keep of the Castle.  Guarding our hearts means keeping our hearts.  “Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life” (Proverbs 4:23).

The Keep is where the goods are, the sustenance, the abundance.  For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks (Luke 6:45).  Ah, now we’re getting somewhere.

What is spoken will be.  Proverbs 18:21 tells us that there is the power of life and death in the tongue.  Focus on the word “power” there, and let’s ask ourselves this question:  Who has the power here – are we going to speak for Satan, words that will destroy our own lives, or are we going to speak for the Lover of our souls, the author and finisher of our faith?

James 3:2 says, “If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body.”  The only thing more amazing to me than how little Christians know about the tongue’s power of life and death, is how often I speak as though I am a total tongue-power ignoramus.

I know and believe the Word’s admonitions regarding the tongue.  I have read and re-read Joyce Meyer’s Me and My Big Mouth. I know that I guard my heart, indeed my entire life, when my tongue is harnessed to the Holy Spirit via prayer and diligent attention to the Word.  I know and believe and have experienced the devastation wrought when I go ahead and wound my very own soul by speaking death words.

Death words are words of darkness and doom, of doubt and dismay.  Words with the power to open my heart right up to fear.  Then comes the physical manifestation – an actual poisoning of my entire system, also known as stress.

We guard our hearts with our tongues, and we guard our tongues when we guard our hearts.  A lovely life circle.  Or, we can go our own way . . . and say whatever the HELL (that’s where it’s from) we FEEL like saying.

What would Jesus have us say?  “Poor poor pitiful me?”  “Woe is me, I’m so misunderstood and unloved?”   “Why does this always happen to me?”

The answer is “none of the above.”  He would have us say, “God is my refuge, God is my strength, a very present help in trouble.”  He Himself would say, “Get thee behind me, Satan!” and “Where’s someone I can love and bless and heal and help?  Come unto me!” (John 7:37).

“Come unto me all ye who are weak and heavy laden.”  We weaken ourselves when we SPEAK the weakness.  Weakness is only a temporary fact, but it is not the truth of the matter.  The truth of the matter is what the Word of God says about it.  He is my shelter (Psalm 61:3), my strong tower, my very present help in trouble.  Sing the song I Will Arise (listen to Phil Driscoll do it first), “I will arise and go to Jesus.  He will embrace me in His arms.  In the arms of my dear Savior, oh there are 10,000 charms.”

What again, would Jesus say?  He would speak from a guarded heart, words of life.  His heart was guarded by his focus on and love for others.  He freed Himself to the beautiful life that is a life of caring for others.

Like, um, well, a Homemaker.